The mobster trump family has a long history of greasing palms at the notoriously corrupt (collectively) Tammany Hall (NYC), among others, beginning with patriarch (don's) papa trump ('Freddy's Dead'). The dutiful foot-soldier/minion of the trump crime family, donald, was more or less relegated to gopher/shovel brigade duties, ie., driving to Maryland and bailing papa out of jail, etc., inasmuch as the eldest brother was favored to take over the family business. While not always true, the axiom, "Only the Good Die Young", was absolutely true in the tRUMP family. Although "the don" tRUMP did survive the tRUMP indoctrination by papa (Freddy) tRUMP which included the constant oral montra "you're a killer, you're a king" (though not without severe psychological damage/trauma), the eldest son was driven to drink and suicide inferably by same.
To his minions, the don opined that a body, possessing a limited amount of energy, would be wasting/expending such finite amount thereof by engaging in physical exercise which consequently was anathema to him. Indeed, tRUMP had such a disgusting/flabby body that before undressing for sex, he required the lights be totally out so that his disgusting naked body could not be discerned. He did have liposuction by one account and as well, an obsession concerning his ever balding head, leading to those "bad hair days" that seem never to go away.
Poor cuckolded 'Iron Mike Tyson' never knew what hit him when, at the "height of his game", tRUMP "took over" his career and his wife (robin givens). Being a "C_ityman", tRUMP went from black hoe, to SO(uthern)HO (marla maples whom he divorced after a relatively short time since she was having sex with "her bodyguard") and now presumably a (currently) NO(rthern)HO.
The don's sister, maryanne trump (barry), was appointed
to the typically corrupt federal bench by ronald reagan. Reagan's ties to the mob have been documented with authority, ie., 'Ronald Reagen, MCA, and the Mob', and while reagan was anti-communist (and I cut him a lot of slack owing to my own staunch opposition to the lie of communism), he was at best a puppet (albeit one I was happy to have in what has now become the blackhouse, particularly since the advent of the criminal, pschopathic clintons - I received a lot of flack/pressure after appropriately referring to him as 'Ronnochio' - If credit were to be given for the end of the cold war, however, credit must be given his astrologer, joan quigley (astrology is total b**l s**t) whom he consulted on every move, color coded days, etc. He was senile then.). maryanne trump was newly appointed when corrupting the corrupt american judicial process in my initial RICO action involving drug money laundered throught the tRUMP casinos. tRUMP is a corrupt, illegal drug money-laundering mobster (among other crimes) as as is so of his mob family, including, ie., u.s. federal employee maryanne trump, click here and particularly (regarding the trump mobsters) here and here and generally, here , all of whom should be in jail] (initials MTB stand for maryanne trump barry, click here .
Trump. You gotta hand it to him. One day, he's introducing a new line of fancy clothing. Next, he's declaring bankruptcy like it's no big deal. In fact, it may turn out to be a great deal! The perfect opportunity for him to start pitching products that are a bit more downscale. Just think of the market for ...
The Trump Signature Toothpick:
Why use a dirty fingernail, when the all-wood, finely honed Trumpick is available wherever fine mints are sitting?
The Trump Home Swimming System:
Imagine the joy of luxuriating in the crystal-clear waters of your very own Trump Hose. Available in forest green or summer leaf, the T.H. comes with two state-of-the-art settings: On and Drip.
The Trump Home Entertainment System:
Why go all the way to Atlantic City to hear Engelbert Humperdinck when you can make Engelbert come to YOU? With the Trump Deluxe AM radio/cassette player, you'll have the beloved balladeer crooning right next to your cot. Get ready for a concert you'll never forget - MINUS the crowds and two-drink minimum. (Tape sold separately.)
Kraft Trumperoni & Cheese:
Move over, SpongeBob.
The Trump Home Gaming System:
Love the thrill of high-stakes gambling, but can't find any more money in Grandma's purse? Don't get mad.Get ready for your next big game by practicing at home with this high-quality, solid polyethylene pair of dice, available in black, red or white, as in white-hot-winning-streak-that-makes-it-all-back-with-enough-left-overto-buy-Granny-a-new-couch! Best of all, this entire prestigious system can fit in your pocket when you go out to look for work. Or beer.
The Trump Twilight Harbor Cruise:
A stunning sunset, shimmering skyline and Lady Liberty herself! You'll pass within waving distance of the lovely Lady as you dine, nap or read the paper on this special ride, departing every 20 minutes from South Ferry.
The Trump Classic Sock Collection:
Six of the most commanding socks in America - and their stunning mates - are yours when you visit one of the new Trump Sock Emporia, conveniently located at a street fair near you. Rugged, ribbed and ready for action, these blindingly white tubes of cotton make any man's toes stand out.
Trump's Farm Apple Wine:
2004. A great year for "The Apprentice." The Olympics. And now, jug wine. Made from apples plucked by the increasingly peeved Melania Knauss herself.
Trump: The Art of the Deal ...
...was written with what? A pencil. And now you can own one, too! The Trump Scribbler boasts a core of solid graphite and a tough, golden shell able to repel even the roughest weather conditions. Perfect if you happen to be writing on a park bench. Or living there.
Originally published on August 11, 2004 (I believe New York Post, which attribution did not properly save).